Who Needs A Love Life When You Have MY Bestfriend?
by Love Is a Myth
Summary: who knew that making a Love Life biography was so hard? 'My love life consists of phone calls, texts and my best friend always butting in' "You suck at this, forehead." "and you suck at being my bestfriend, so shut up, pig" "Touche." -- there's no yuri.


**I do not own Naruto.**

**This story is somewhat dedicated to my bestfriend, a knife in the stomache, because she gave me the inspiration for me to write this.**

**This is also the story you requested, Sakura member of Akatsuki-love, and I know I already said my other story 'The Pink Shell' was dedicated to you, I'm having authors block for that and that and I think I won't be able to stay true to your request so yeah( saso and gaa are still her bros and *** with her) ….. on with the story!**

_**-**_

_**Who Needs A Love Life When You Have MY Bestfriend?**_

_**My love life consists of phone calls, texts and my best friend always butting in**_

_**-**_

----piece of paper---

There are three major factors in my current love life, not including me; they all have different roles and different duties in it.

First, is the Guy –as my BF would refer to him as- he is the one who started all the ruckus in my life, he is better known as The Love –eeewwww- interest.

Second, is The Brother –courtesy yet again of my BF- he is, well I don't know what he is!

Third, - last and least. SMACK! …last but not the least- The Best Friend, she's my informant and my confidant, so yeah….

--- end of piece of paper---

`"ugh! You are so-so….. BAD! For the lack of a better word, you are horrible at writing this!"

"Well, what exactly is this supposed to be anyway?!"

"It's _supposed_ to be an autobiography of _your_ current crazy love life!"

"Hey! I resent that! And how many times do I even have to tell you?! I. DO . NOT . HAVE . A . LOVE . LIFE!"

"Yeah, and I _do_ have an aversion to men."

"But you don't!"

"Exactly. But seeing as you're sooo bad at writing your own biography, I'll just have to write it for you."

"No! You'll just, exaggerate details, like you always do! And what the hell is it for anyway?"

"It's for our still clueless friends on the matter of your love life; I mean I don't plan for you and me to babble on for hours on the current status of your relationships, like the last time with shizune! I mean we even went as far as to tell every detail and to show her the actual text messages!"

"Well, yeah it is troublesome, but what's more troublesome is if whatever the hell you plan on writing is going out to the whole world, by something as wacky as posting it to the internet for romantic people to read about!"

"You know I will NEVER do that- I'll at least change the details a bit then change your description and name too- and besides when you grow old and have grandkids or children you can show them the biography about your love life, when you were young and foolish, made by your ever so fabulous best friend!"

"Yeah, riiight."

"Whatever, I'm going to start now, see ya later!"

"wha—"

BANG!

_Click._

"Ino-pig! Don't you dare do it! Open up!"

"No can't do, honey. This is for your own good! And you don't know maybe reading what I wrote will open your eyes to what people in the third person point of view see your situation as, or In this case FOURTH PERSON'S VIEW!"

"Gah! Open up!"

"Don't worry, I'll be writing this as if you yourself was the one writing!"

"Gah! I give up! I'll be back in an hour and hopefully with a key by then."

"Not looking forward to it! Bye Fore-Head!"

-

*sigh

Now that she's gone I could start with my work…

_Blink_

_Blink. Blink._

How the hell did all these started anyway?!!

-

-

-*-

-

[sakura]

sigh

Ino could be so troublesome THAT or might just be hanging around shikamaru too much nowadays.

Another sigh

But now that I think about it, I shouldn't really be getting mad at ino, because she can't help it, it's like second nature, If there was anyone to blame it would be _him_.

.

Akasuna no Sasori.

.

It actually started with meeting him through my mom; apparently he was my mom's friend's son. He was a senior, in the all boy's school just right next to the all girl's school I was attending. He was part of some military training thing, which even now I still don't know the name of; he was also smart- at least that's what I heard. I on the other hand was a freshman and was part of the forensics club, and it's not about dead bodies! We DEBATE okay? Got that clear?! see how different we were?

But even so, we became I guess friends, we would talk from time to time over the phone, he'd tell me about his day, and I'd listen and vice versa. We also talked about his crush, konan I think was her name, he was also contemplating on whether or not he should ask her out, and of course I told him to do so, and that's when it all started, for me at least, I don't know about him.

-

{ino}

They were playing some sort of card games with other teens her mom's friends brought over. I think it was killers? I wasn't paying much attention, since I didn't care for that part of her babbling, and because I just found it simply creepy that her mom's like the all American perfect socialite mother, when they were freaking Japanese! That's partly why I thought she was a foreigner and the other half is that she is so fluent in English- not that I'm influent or anything- and she had PINK, for god's sakes, pink hair! But anywho, moving on, that was also the same time where sasori told sakura that he was planning on asking out his crush, and knowing fore-head she was all for it. His plan was that he was going to stick a post it on one of the cards and that he put it on the card, that his crush will get, geekily freaky huh? I know right, my reaction was that ' post it? You gotta be freaking kidding me! What an adorable dork!'

-

[sakura]

I remember that I 'accidentally' got the card with the post it saying '_will you go out with me?' _and I kept thinking 'shit sasori, you screwed up! Shit, you screwed up!' and him and everybody else kept saying he didn't screw up!

-

{ino}

Knowing forehead it took her about 15 minutes to figure out why they kept saying sasori didn't screw up, it was because he was asking _her_ out, and the dumbass didn't get it until it was pointed out to her! And when she relayed this particular event to me I kept saying 'I knew it! I knew it' well it was sort of obvious since the last time they talked over the phone.

-

"_so… if I __couldn't__ find a date for graduation ball can __**you**__ come with me?"_

"_um…uh… maybe…I'll ask…..but it is __**if**__ you can't find a date right? And I thought you were asking out konan?"_

"_uh…yeah… I just asked, you know, just curious if you would agree…."_

"_um.. yeah…bye!"_

"_b-"_

_Beep. Beep. Beep._

_-_

Yup even in through phone calls they were still such dorks- the adorkable kind- so when she told me about that particular conversation of theirs, I knew, that he will eventually ask her out, and I even hinted it to forehead, but she didn't believe me, so to my surprise Monday morning she barraged me with all the mushy stuff.

And that is precisely when the phone call song was born.

-

[sakura]

At first I've only told ino about my secret –because believe it or not she can actually keep a secret with enough motivation and threats and bribes….- but ever since that night with the game of killers and sasori asking me out, I really wanted to tell my other friends, tenten, temari, kin, tayuya, and hinata. So I told them, and that was the worst ever mistake I have done in my whole love life.

-

{ino}

It was freaking hilarious when I went back to the classroom after I bought food for lunch- skipped recess, you know cause I really need to lose some carbs- kin, temari and tenten were, singing in this terribly high pitched voices, but that's not the funny part it was lyrics!

Sasori and forehead talking on the phone,

K-I-S-S-I-N-G!

THAT plus some other jumbled up lyrics they kept singing, and when I got there forehead was fuming mad! Probably because the _whole_ class was hearing it! It was one of the funniest and most satisfying lunch ever!

[sakura]

And after that fiasco, I resolved to only telling ino about these things – unbelievable right?- but I had more pressing matters at hand at that time, like say for example, I didn't know what our relationship was, were we friends? Were we dating? But no, ino just had to talk to me about that when I was still confused about it, so things got pretty………. Confusing.

.

"_So forehead, is he a good kisser?"_

"_W-what?!"_

"_Nasty! Don't spit your damned drink on my uniform!"_

"_S-sorry, ino, but you just surprised me…."_

"_What? You mean the two of you haven't kissed yet? Wait are you two even _dating?_"_

"_uh…um…."_

"_You didn't say yes when he asked you out?!"_

"_well.. you see…."_

_Sigh_

"_Let me guess it's complicated."_

"_Yes, like that. It's just that I don't feel like we're just normal friends you know? But it's not like we're dating either…"_

"_BUT he did ask you out right? Then why the hells are you guys so confused about this shit? Never mind your both just clueless dorks anyway…right? You did say that he's only had one girlfriend in his lifetime in high school, and that it was out of curiosity and pity, right?"_

"_That's what he told me…"_

"_Okay good enough, so I now declare you both…….(drum rolls please!)_

_Friends with Benefits!"_

"_W-what?!"_

"_Gah! How many times have I told you not to spit at my uniform?!"_

_._

{ino}

Ah, good times, good times. That conversation brought forth many more embarrassing moments than I could count.

Then I think after Christmas and new year's vacation, was the next major event happened…

[sakura]

We went to the annual ridge high fair where you know people have fun in booths, by students, for the students and for the people who are not students. We were excited, I remembered when we were on our way to ridge high's school grounds, well for the most part at least, ino was a bit miffed at being scolded by my mom for wearing a tank top to an all boy's schools fair, and I had to say I thought my mom was a bit reasonable about it, but I wish she was a bit more discreet or gentle or 'less prudish and embarrassing' as ino and the others would put it, I mean I guess she is a little bit overbearing but what can I do? She's my mom. Though I wished she was a little more normal (or in my case someone who can be fun and supporting) because I swear, I sometimes hear ino and my other friends who get to meet my mom, talk about how my mom's an alien and I maybe half human and half alien, that it would explain the pink hair. It was embarrassing and I didn't feel hurt, oddly enough, because I'm used to it, where ever we move that's always the reaction of my new friends who come over, and that's how I found out that there was nothing wrong with my friends or me, the problem was actually my mom.

{ino}

We went to ridge high's fair, even though I was still BV at sakura's alien mom, I mean can you believe that she freaked out just because I was wearing a tank top, jeans and cardigan? Moving on, It's full of events as usual and many food stands too, but that wasn't really the first things that we saw, - and I know for one thing that I didn't go to their fair for those but for the eye candy of course! Hey being in an all girls school does that to you, so no calling me slut, bitches!- we saw sasori, me for the first time and the others first time in person, can you believe that they face book stalked-er viewed his profile? When we saw him he was in this hot, hunky military uniform, I think he's supposed to be one of the 'guards' for the fair, and let's just say that forehead hyperventilated as if there was no tomorrow as soon as we saw him…..

He was to simply put, he looked like an angel, an angel that looked forever bored…. And when I observed that I just had to think, was he really the same guy that I had been saying is adorkable? He didn't seem like the type to do those things with _anyone._ And believe me 'cause I have a good eye for people's characters…

But I just ignored the stupid nagging feeling, I mean forehead's beyond happy that she could die- and with her hyperventilating that fast, she just might follow our dear sensei to _the other side_, I really miss you asuma-sensei! Wherever the hell you are, I hope that they took away your damned cigarettes!- and contrary to popular belief I'm not THAT mean as to shoot her down from her absolute euphoria. So I just opted to dro—I mean look at the free eye candies layed in front of us!

[sakura]

At the entrance to fair we were talking and laughing at ino, but right when I saw _him_, I didn't even know what we were laughing about anymore, there he was wearing his military uniform, looking tall and proud, and he was inspecting my bag! And the whole time my friends were just laughing behind their hands! And after that fiasco, they even had the nerve to tell me that I was hyperventilating the whole time that he was there!

{ino}

After yet another embarrassing episode from forehead we went on our way, it started, normaly enough with only me, forehead, kin and temari. But the trouble started when we got bored of looking through the booths and eating….

[sakura]

The real trouble in the fair began when we were bored and wanted to do something like, ride in rides. At first we passed by the inflatables, there were two, and ino wanted to go in one, so naturally suggested the big one first, but kin didn't want to because it was too crowded, too crowded with boys to be exact, maybe that's why ino wanted to go there in the first place, then ino just suggested the other one. It was a green chibi dinosaur like inflatable really small like a bubble that can hold five people, maximum, and it's closed too, locking the air inside unlike the other one that was open air, so as expected temari indigantly said no, because she's claustrophobic- and no being claustrophobic DOES NOT mean that she is afraid of Santa Claus, yes I do watch sponge bob-, it means she's afraid of closed and small places. So that idea was shot down the drain and ino got a little bit more down. So to cheer everyone up I said that there were more rides that we could try together, so we walked some more….. and let's just say that everything went downhill from there…..

{ino}

I was frustrated when we were _trying_ to find a ride that was not lame and something that we could all ride, the key word being trying. Because kin was being a prude, while temari was well phobic, but I couldn't blame them for that, 'cause those are the things that make them, them so I can take that. But I couldn't have expected, ever , that forehead would bring me down, ever, she was always the perfect girl or what not, so I didn't expect her to whine, that she didn't want to go to the one ride that was the classicest, safest, and common ride, ever, the ferris wheel. Seriously, she was like a bitch in heat, when she kept saying no, no, no, and a big fat no to the prospect of riding the small, safe and wittle-little ferris wheel! I can't believe that I finally found a flaw on SAKURA HARUNO; the perfect girl (except when it comes to love matters) was scared of ferris wheel! Though at the time I wasn't as amused as I am right now, now that I remember it. I think I got absolutely even **more** miffed if that was possible, so let's just say that there were some insults, jabs and many hard feelings thrown around…..

[Sakura]

At that time even when they (kin) insulted me to rile me up into going to the ferris wheel, and mad sarcastic comments (ino), and my friends had hard feelings for me (ino, but not that big, but kin was absolutely in I-am-so-upset-that-would-want-to-break-our-friendship mode) THAT or they were drowning me in guilt from their understandingness (temari) but I survived it all, and for what? Because of my irrational fear of a damned ferris wheel. But at the time I was really afraid of feriss wheels –I still am, but I'm being more subtle with it now- so any rational thinking of losing yet another set of friends was lost to me. So yeah that really set to fire my friends chagrin at me….

{Ino}

So in the end we still went to ride the Ferris wheel, but only me kin, and temari, seeing as foreheads so stubborn about not going, but I got a bit cheered up, when in the line to going to the Feriss wheel someone asked for my cell number, but I don't think that kin had the same sentiment, since she was reaaly BV all the way. But I felt sorry for temari the most because she was alone in her cart while kin and me were together in one cart, because temari lost in janken pon, and good thing temari was understanding, she even explained to us that it was ideal because if I were to sit alone I would faint and die, and if kin were to be paired up with a stranger she'd strangle them to death, so it was really logical to pair me up with kin and temari alone. But still I couldn't help feel bad for temari because she might get stuck with a complete stranger!

And you know what the worse part is? When we were already seated—me and kin, while temari was on another cart ALONE!—sasori approached forehead and she didn't even realize it, until we kept screaming phone call! And yet she STILL didn't get it, but in the end he tapped her in the shoulders, and you know what they did next?

-

-

They freaking CHATTED!

While we were screaming our asses off in the ferris wheel, while temari was looking like an idiot screaming all alone, and whenever we passed by them we would scream "phone call!"(kin and temari) or "F you forehead!" (me, of course) and so let's just say that from then on sasori thought that foreheads friends were worthy of staying away from.

[sakura]

It was actually quite funny if you overlooked the BV parts, because they kept screaming at me and whenever they're on top they would scream "My Name Is Raine!"—courtesy of tenten since she started being obsessed with him and screaming that line over and over again—and sasori just walked away after a few words were exchanged, ofcourse with a confused and weirded out expression, I mean, who wouldn't? My friends were freaks! But that's why I'm friends with them, I guess.

{ino}

And after that horrendous ride in the ferris wheel, let's just say that there was an exchange of very refined words….

"_How could you, fore head?!"_

"_We were dying back there, while you were having another one of your moments with your boy toy!"_

"_I understand that you like sasori very much but…. I WAS SCREAMING LIKE AN IDIOT ALL BY MYSELF UP THERE WHILE YOU WERE FLIRTING LIKE HELL DOWN HERE!"_

"_**WE THOUGHT IT WAS HOES BEFORE BROS, YO! BUT I GUESS WE WERE WRONG SINCE YOU OBVIOUSLY PREFER BROS OVER HOES!"**_

So yeah, after that it was quite uneventful, except for the parts where boys come up to me and kept asking for my number….. giggles

[sakura]

After the fair, nothing really big came up, it's the only the usual…… until 2 days after. It started with the usual start of our conversations in the phone, we did the 'how was your day?' tradition and just chatted over random stuff but….

"_So yeah, that's how I got in trouble with my commanding officer."_

"_Hahahahaha, I can't believe your friend blew up your school's dorms and then you got blamed! Ahahaha you have some pretty great friends don't you?"_

"_Yeah…. "_

"_Well, it's getting late… so... bye"_

_  
"Yeah… good night, bye."_

"_You too….. bye"_

"_I Love You."_

"_Um….. bye!"_

**BEEP, BEEP, BEEP**

He told me he loves me.

{ino}

Adorkable told forehead he loves her.

_He_ told _her_ he loves her.

**Sasori told Sakura he loves her.**

**He **_**LOVES**_** Her!**

**OH. MY. GOD.**

After that let's just say that…..all hell broke loose that Friday at school……

[sakura]

As if it wasn't bad enough that all of my friends now know of that particular phone call, know ino is trying to give me 'the talk'

"_Okay, I know that you haven't dated before or even fall in love for that matter, so I'm going to tell you more about men and their---"_

"_NO! ino you are not going to give me the birds and the bees talk okay?"_

_Sigh_

"_I'm just trying to look out for you know? He told you he's going to wait for you to return his feelings right? So just take your time no need to rush and say I love you back, just go with the flow of events, and just don't fall in love with him just yet."_

"_W-what are you—"_

"_What I mean is, even though he told you he loves you, doesn't mean he's going to keep that promise of his for long you know? And with him going to study in England after graduation, I don't think it'll be good for you if you get too attached or worse fall in love, long term relationships rarely last."_

"_W-what? He's going to England?!"_

"_He didn't tell you?"_

And that's how I found out that he was really going to leave, I even asked him and he admitted it. Once again he told me he'd wait for me, even if he's already in England, but I wasn't so sure anymore, everything was just happening so fast….

-

-*-

-

[sakura]

After yet another tiring event, we finally, got some piece a few weeks after the fair, the 'I love you' phone call and the going to England issue ended, but I guess luck wasn't on my side, after all.

Because Monday morning I got some pretty disturbing news, from my secret agent slash spy….

{ino}

It was boring Monday morning, I brushed, I brushed my hair, and I brushed everywhere, but that isn't the main point, the main point is, what I found out in the morning during the bus ride…

I had a bus mate who was-coincidentally enough- studying in ridge high, and so me being bored, I asked if he knew someone named akasuna no sasori and oddly enough he asked me if by any chance Sasori was part of the A.K.A.T.S.U.K.I. military (yay! Finally figured out what it's called) and he said he did, and that's not the only thing he said too. He was actually Sasori's classmate at ridge high, his name is Deidara he was third year and part of the A.K.A.T.S.U.K.I. military too, he was pretty cool if you overlook the part where he was such a hairstyle stealer……. Moving on, he told me ALL about sasori and he's _past_ and let's just say it's not the same 'past' that he told sakura……

[sakura]

Come Monday morning, and I didn't hear a single peep or snide comment at all from ino, I was starting to think that she wasn't ino at all, not talking about gossip and guys….. but then when I finally confronted her at lunch…… I wish I hadn't.

-

-*-*-*-*-*-

**THIS IS NOT THE END!**

**This is not the end yet. It will be longer but I won't add another chapter I'll just add them to this chapter, so look out for it. I repeat, THIS IS NOT THE END.**


End file.
